FIVE YEAR PLAN

While checking Facebook this morning, I clicked to "see my memories." Usually when I do this, I either see a picture of one of my babies and think, "Wow. They were seriously so cute and tiny," or I read an old status and think, "Wow. I was seriously an ass."

Today's memory brought up an emotion of a different sort. On this day, five years ago, I posted this:



Five years ago, I had no idea if I would one day be a mother. We had just finished our home study and were hopeful things would work out that way, but I had no way of knowing.

I had now way of knowing that, five years later, I would be a mother to three beautiful, wild babies, who take up more room in my heart than I even knew was there. Born within three years of each other (two years and 51 weeks if we're being specific), they are miracles- each one of them. Their timing, their stories, the way they found their way to us is nothing that I could have ever imagined.

I wonder, sometimes, what I would tell myself, if I could go back in time.

Just wait.

One day.

You have absolutely no idea what's coming.

It is so incredibly wonderful.

The plan that I had for myself and my future five years ago was a good one, I'm sure. Though, I don't really remember what it was; my life certainly hasn't panned out the way I once imagined it would.

I laugh when I think of making big life plans now. And while I still do it- though tentatively, because I feel like I know better- I know that there's only one plan that really matters, and that is the plan that God has for each of us.

Personal interpretation leads me to believe that, while He cares deeply about us, He does not have an exact outline detailing every part of each individual's mortal existence. I believe in agency and in the resulting circumstances and consequences that having said agency creates.

But, I know still that He has a plan for everyone. It's the same plan for each of us.

It's one of redemption; one of salvation; one of eternal happiness, if you will. It gives me hope like nothing else can.

I believe that, one day, if we could go back to where we are now, it is because of this plan that we would tell our old selves:

Just wait.

One day.

You have absolutely no idea what's coming.

It is so incredibly wonderful.

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